Let’s talk about how to not only survive the holidays, but to really make the best use of these winter holy days.
First, let’s keep remembering that the winter time is for resting and visioning. Our ancestors huddled near the fire, were active only during the shortened daylight, and made use of the dark times naturally.
According to the earth’s wisdom, it’s not supposed to be about bright lights and malls and shopping. It really is the time where you’re dreaming and visioning. Like the sleeping trees, this resting period of Winter activates a deep reset in your body, mind, and spirit.
Secondly, let’s keep remembering that our culture does not believe what I just said. So what you have is people that are running around, feeling these deep feelings and visions, wanting desperately to rest, but feeling spurred to prove themselves instead. Torture. Pressure. Exhaustion.
That’s why everybody is so grumpy. So it’s important to be compassionate, and patient with the folks who don’t know that it’s time to slow down.
Thirdly, emotions run high when folks get together during the Winter. Of course part of that is this overwhelming pressure to perform during the winter months when everyone should be resting and dreaming. But part of it is also the post traumatic stress of a lifetime of going against the winter grain.
Year after year, we have been pushing and shoving in department stores, dressing up and slapping on smiles when we really didn’t feel like it during the winter time. We are holding year after year of trauma of this inauthentic performance hoo haw. And then every year, we are expected to do it again.
This is why we feel crappy in the winter. This is why we drink too much at holiday parties. Something inside of us knows damn well that this is all wrong.
So, now that you know what the Winter is really for, ask yourself what you need to stay in rest mode, even if you have parties and obligations to fulfill.
Ask yourself what you can do. Perhaps you can add two hours to your sleep time every night, so you have time to go into deep sleep, and dream.
Maybe you can promise yourself to keep your shopping simple, or institute a “thrift store” or handmade Christmas policy like my family has created. Take the pressure off of the performative consumerist proving-love race.
And when you feel those old emotions rising, like the grief for all the years of restful wintering lost, be compassionate with yourself, as you are compassionate with others.
This WinterHolidayPush is a cultural trauma that we keep pressing on ourselves and each other year after year.
Dare to shift.
Dare to honor the winter solstice, the darkest point of the year, with silence and quiet connection.
Dare to challenge what you know are cultural lies about this Sacred, dark season.
You are a grown up, and you can do this season however you want.
Mellissa was a Stanford-educated business lawyer until her intuitive abilities awakened in the year 2000 with the birth of her daughter. Now she bridges the worlds of business strategy and intuitive intelligence. Creative designers, Fortune 500 executives, and thought leaders hire her to teach them how to Channel their Genius – to create on demand, to stay in their flow state, and to create lucrative businesses that follow their souls’ calling.